How to deal with Conflict? Activity

How to deal with CONFLICT? activity.

One of the biggest challenges for therapists is working with clients in conflict. My metaphoric cards, Family Circles, is an incredibly effective tool in working with couples, families and even individuals. This work can be done either as Group work or working with individual units in conflict.

Here is one example of a situation involving couples who experience recurring conflict situations:

 a)     Lay out your Family Circle cards, face up, on an accessible surface.

 b)    Instruct the couple (or the group of couples): “Please look at these cards and choose one (or more) which represents a quality, or a tendency or a trait IN YOURSELF that contributes to the conflict.”

(You may elaborate here that this exercise is not meant for people to self-reflect and that later there will be an opportunity to point to other person’s share in the conflict)

 c)     Ask each participant to reveal the card they have chosen and ask for a brief explanation.

 d)    After all participants reveal their cards and explain their choice, you invite a conversation about taking some personal responsibility for the conflict.

 This conversation tends to get emotional sometimes and motivate individuals to talk about themselves rather than engage in blame. Spend some time reviewing tools and skills to manage conflict. At a time when you feel they are ready, shift the conversation to:

e)    What do you believe you have tried to do, in the past, to solve conflictual situations?

f)      After having engaged in this exercise, what do you think you may be able to do in order to manage conflicts better?